Saturday, January 26, 2008

My First Lorna's Laces Socks

I've noticed that I've been wearing these socks a lot this winter.

I made these before I started blogging. I think it's been about two years now. These socks still look new. I got the pattern from this book called Stocking Feet published by I just used single crochet for the foot.

I was very proud of them then and still am now. I ran out of yarn on the left foot and could never find the same colorway again. Even though the fabric resembles that of a fishnet, they are still very warm and comfy.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Tough Titty! Knitting Content, I Swear

I often have children running towards me at full speed for one reason or the other. Therefore I've honed skills of sneaking around the house or always remember to lock the door behind me (depending upon what I'm doing) even though they've started picking locks. I was walking toward the children this time. Four to be exact since there were visitors last weekend. I was cradling a precious project in my arms as usual along with size 2.5 circular needles, when I was blessed with a full speed running hug accompanied by the beloved song "Mooooommmmy."

This drove one of my needles right into my areola. I screamed and looked down for blood but found none.

The other night, I noticed that said boob was sore. It had probably been sore for quite some time and I hadn't noticed. If you can't understand how I couldn't notice such a thing, ask any currently nursing mother. It's a feeling you grow accustomed to after a while so it may take a while to realize unusual boob tenderness, even years later. Breast feeding is beautiful but it's the worst pain you'll ever feel. Teddy Bear was breastfed exclusively.

I felt myself up and noticed that there was a scab. The knitting needle had actually punctured my tit. Ain't that a...

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

FO's, Hair, Politics

I was finally able to squeeze some pictures out of my tired camera. So, I'll post some fiber content first.

I told ya'll I got a Stitch N' Bitch Happy Hooker book for Christmas. Seems likes the projects have been flying off of the pages right into my lap, yes Ma'm.

First it was the Bunny Slippers. Done here in a yarn that's NOT meant for walking around on the floor with. So glad I didn't bother to sew eyes and nose on. I sure ain't buying the fancy stuff the book recommends. By mistake, on the first slipper I used the slipper insole for the bottom sole. I like this mistake because it looks better and fits my size 8 foot more snuggly.

Then the One Skein Scarf which happened in just a couple of hours cause I found this acrylic yarn I liked. I got some in camaflouge colors too. Maybe I'll make something for Little Man after all. I love this scarf, I really do. I swear this girl has to be in every picture. I hear her in there being bossy right now.

And finally, Fat Bottom Bag, which only took a couple of days, and which I was able to use yarn from my stash that was gifted to me about 2 years ago and which I am completely delighted with. I'm so glad I waited for the right project for this yarn. My co-workers gave it to me along with a patterns book of some tacky shrugs. I wish I could see them now to show them what perfect yarn they chose for the Fat Bottom bag. Bless their hearts. I only have to find handles and a brooch now.

I'm working on the Jolly Rancher too, but it's giving me problems because I don't like scull and cross bones and am trying to substitute a dirt bike silhouette. Therefore, I can't waste my precious camera energy on it.

This weekend, I tried to color my hair with a "rinse" or as the bottle says, temporary color. I rarely, rarely colored my hair when it was processed, and I've never used a rinse before. The bottle said "Vibrant Color." I didn't want it to be a vibrant Dark Cherry, just a hint of a dark cherry. So, I didn't leave it in there for the full 30 minutes and I rinsed as much as I could out. Most of my linens are white, and I didn't want that stuff on my sheets. I guess that's why there's not one hint of Dark Cherry Jazzing left in my hair. It's like I did nothing. Should I try again?

Today at work I took it upon myself to remind everyone that if they wanted to vote in the Presidential Primaries that in California it is the last day to register to vote. There's one Black employee on our campus. He's from Detroit but has traveled around the country with his family in pursuit of career advancement. He doesn't vote. He didn't admit it to me, but I can tell. He told me that letting everyone know what my political preferences were (voting for the Black candidate) may prevent me from getting promoted as quickly so I should "keep it on da unda."

It went like this:

Me: This is your last day to register to vote if you plan on voting in the California Presidential Primaries.

Him: I'ma register, I'ma register (I've been trying to get him to do this for the last two weeks.)

Me: Well, today is your LAST chance, just do it.

Him: Guurl, you don't need to be tellin' errbody who you wanna vote for. You need to keep it on da unda. That might keep you from gettin yo lil promotion.

Me: If there ever was a time that we need to make it known who and what we stand for, it's now. And, maybe one day soon we won't need to keep it on da unda. Boy, I gotta get that Detroit outta you (I shouldn't have said this).

Him: Oh, errbody in Detroit is fo Barack. They all Black out der, so you know they makin' it known who they wanna vote for.

Me: Ok, so you need to make it known too and just be less....less, what is the term I'm searching for?

Him: You searchin' for the term Uncle Tom.

Me: Is that what I'm trying to say? Is that how you refer to yourself???!!!! You refer to yourself as an Uncle Tom?!

Him: Yeah, you just ack like you not sho whodda vote fo. And den ack like it just seem like most of the best points go twads yo guy.

At this point my eyes start scanning my office, I don't know what I'm looking for. I find it. It's about a 4 foot stick Engineers use for marking gas lines, phone lines, etc. I pick it up. He realizes what I'm about to do and makes a run for it. Thank God there weren't any witnesses. Don't worry, I couldn't get a decent swing because the long stick was too awkward to maneuver in the narrow hallway and he got away. Do you think I over reacted? What's wrong with our people? I really wanted to beat some sense into him.

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Race and Politics

What is it about the tears of a white woman that make men faint? I really thought that when Hilary put on her little performance that would be the deal breaker. I think that this country is ready for a woman president, however it is not ready for one that openly shows emotion. I started to wonder how she was able to maintain composure in the public eye when her husband’s freaky deaky little Monica interludes were the main topic but couldn’t now. It wasn’t until the next day and the photo finish in New Hampshire that I realized her plan. It’s said that it is because of her “composure” that the American people can’t really relate to her. They said that the fact that she didn’t provide a question and answer session in Iowa added to her this ice woman persona. Therefore, I think that she was willing to do whatever it took to take first place in New Hampshire. I bet you we don’t ever see her cry again (at least not soon).

Now, she has to bring some race bullshit into the picture by saying “I’m not a racist, I have friends who are black.” Ok, she didn’t say that, but she might as well have because to me all of her responses to being criticized for racially tainted remarks were equally as stupid. Now that Barak has squashed the whole deal by reminding her to stay on point, her campaign has started whining about the goings on in Las Vegas. Barak is simply talking to and listening to people in industries that presidential campaigns don’t usually care about. “Ok, while the others are lying to a bunch of people in states with a dying car manufacturing industry (you can’t stop progress), I’m going to go talk to people who will be working for ever and ever (cause last I checked those robotic servants on the Jetson’s and Shaggy and Scooby are a long time coming).” This is what I imagine Barak’s campaign was thinking. Hilary’s camp is probably wondering what even to say to this “type” of people. She can’t cry again so soon, so they’re taking other avenues.

My cousin married a non U.S. citizen. Their love was genuine, and through this relationship we met a lot of his single foreign friends. My cousins and I became notorious for advising his friends to avoid getting into relationships with white women. They didn’t listen to us. We are also notorious for saying “I told you so” when the relationships went bad but ridiculously in the woman’s favor. My cousin even told something like "I told you so" to an ex-Ambassador who got swept by a white woman.

I’m going out on a limb here and risking making some of you angry because I’m hoping that some of my readers are ones who have never voted before. I’ve voted since I was 18, but I admit that most of the campaigning process and politics in general had been confusing and intimidating to me. Therefore, I often voted not because I thought my candidate would be the best one to deal with the most important issues (I can’t determine what those are for you), but because of what type of person I thought he was. I still use this as a measure, although now I have a much better understanding of the whole political process. I have a feeling (and really hope) that this year, you’re going to vote. So, when faced with choosing between a white woman who wants to manipulate with tears as opposed to a black man who wants to hear what I have to say so badly that he’s willing to come to my job to listen. Guess who I’m gonna pick?

Obama for change!

Long Meetings

Just how long should a business meeting be? I’m taking a break from and 8 hour meeting now. Good thing I like all of the people in this meeting. Shouldn’t you be able to get some real work accomplished between one to two hours?

This is how my last couple of weeks have been, just a series of looooong meetings. You see, we schedule these meetings to make up for the fact that the system we operate in doesn’t work. But, all anyone wants to talk about in the meetings are how the system doesn’t work. Here’s a bright idea, why don’t we just schedule some meetings to talk about how to re-vamp the system, but for now, can you update me with the information that I need to move forward with my many projects?!

Yesterday, while in a three hour meeting that went all bad for my office, I wished that I had a tazer. There’s this new guy who was hired to deal with the issues of this certain office who aren’t nearly producing the way they need to. Only thing is, he wants to get into everyone else’s business too. I could have tazed his ass over, and over again. It felt so good this morning to, with the permission of my boss, block his access and all the access of his underlings from our digital records. I bet his dumb ass thought he had a right to our database. Sike!

When’s the last time you’ve been trapped in a room together with people for hours? After a while, peoples’ Right Guard start turning left, they lose the ability to fight flatulence, and their hunger pangs start to affect their attitudes. My dad has always had the ability to make floors tremble whenever he farted. He used to say to us, “That was the floor cracking.” I used to think this was just so gross. But now I know that my poor daddy had to hold his farts all day long because he was around people all day long. This is why I try to be patient with people who in long meetings decide that they absolutely have to fart that ghost. Boooooooohoooooo! We’re all human.

Now my boss is trying to convince me to go to yet another meeting with the promise that after it ends at 3:00 pm I can go home. Deal or no deal?