Thursday, January 17, 2008

Long Meetings

Just how long should a business meeting be? I’m taking a break from and 8 hour meeting now. Good thing I like all of the people in this meeting. Shouldn’t you be able to get some real work accomplished between one to two hours?

This is how my last couple of weeks have been, just a series of looooong meetings. You see, we schedule these meetings to make up for the fact that the system we operate in doesn’t work. But, all anyone wants to talk about in the meetings are how the system doesn’t work. Here’s a bright idea, why don’t we just schedule some meetings to talk about how to re-vamp the system, but for now, can you update me with the information that I need to move forward with my many projects?!

Yesterday, while in a three hour meeting that went all bad for my office, I wished that I had a tazer. There’s this new guy who was hired to deal with the issues of this certain office who aren’t nearly producing the way they need to. Only thing is, he wants to get into everyone else’s business too. I could have tazed his ass over, and over again. It felt so good this morning to, with the permission of my boss, block his access and all the access of his underlings from our digital records. I bet his dumb ass thought he had a right to our database. Sike!

When’s the last time you’ve been trapped in a room together with people for hours? After a while, peoples’ Right Guard start turning left, they lose the ability to fight flatulence, and their hunger pangs start to affect their attitudes. My dad has always had the ability to make floors tremble whenever he farted. He used to say to us, “That was the floor cracking.” I used to think this was just so gross. But now I know that my poor daddy had to hold his farts all day long because he was around people all day long. This is why I try to be patient with people who in long meetings decide that they absolutely have to fart that ghost. Boooooooohoooooo! We’re all human.

Now my boss is trying to convince me to go to yet another meeting with the promise that after it ends at 3:00 pm I can go home. Deal or no deal?

2 comments:

urbanknitrix said...

WOW. I hate meetings about nothing. It USE to happen to me at work, but not any more - my boss has deemed them uneffective, so we don't have them.

But my Home Owner's Association is another story, I am always interrupting saying, okay we need to move towards solutions and we need a time keeper and let's keep it moving. But u always got that one, who stands up and talks about grass growing on their eyes or something - got nothing to do with nothing. Ugh.

Knitaholictoo said...

lovin' your fat bottom bag!